I slept less than two hours last night, and then worked a 12 hour day. I've gotten maybe five or six hours of sleep a night every night for at least two weeks, sometimes less. I should be exhausted, which I am, but I'm also WIDE the fuck awake and not just a little hyperactive. … Continue reading Sometimes I Wonder If I Share Too Much… 🤔😂
What follows is a selection from The Sacred Lost Tomes of The Ryan, the brief and terrible history of which is glossed over here and here. A lysergic, funereal ode to insomnia and hallucinogen consumption, this piece of shit was written circa 2001, possibly not long after I dreamed I died. one drop i can’t sleep, … Continue reading one drop
- I have that Thou song stuck in my head again. - It's a Nirvana song. - Sure, but it's the version Thou recorded that's stuck in my head. - Our head. - Right. OUR head. - Always is. Nirvana is catchy shit, even when DOOMED the fuck out. - Hell, especially when DOOMED the … Continue reading Manic Conversations By The Ryan, With The Ryan
This is a (clearly) highly manipulated image of my dry erase "organization" board, or "Writer's Board," in my *ahem* office slash work space slash insanity pod slash zen spot slash.... How long can a neurotic slash borderline psychotic slash unhinged silly guy slash funny man hipster insomniac unwillingly exist as both a night owl and … Continue reading What Mania Looks Like?
Las Vegas is a peculiar beast at 3 am on a Thursday. In the off-season. Man...I have wanted a reason to write that line for a decade. Now that I have, the accomplishment feels...hollow. Fremont Street, most known for the pervasive and vibrant overhead deluge of spectral neon glooming, feels a bit hollow as well, … Continue reading Terrible Vibes All Around Us – Part VI – Witching Hour Wandering in Photos
After a good thirty-two days (and a handful of hours, but who's counting) of being in one of the more onerous and detrimental depressive episodes I've yet experienced, I have emerged frantically from the ashes tonight and taken gloriously spastic flight in wide-eyed, feral mania! I keep having to think back through my activities today … Continue reading Random Late Night Musing Fueled by Mania and Caffeine