Marcy Sings and Ryan Swings (Between Thoughts of Murder and Suicide)

Support the Human Extermination and Decimation Project. Obey your gods. Elect your masters. Kill your neighbors, then yourself. New Digressed Mind song and music video are live NOW. Music for human filth, composed by animal excrement. FOAD. Links below. Kill your neighbors then yourself. Music Video directed by Hank The Wvrm Digressed Mind on … Continue reading Marcy Sings and Ryan Swings (Between Thoughts of Murder and Suicide)

joke’s on me

you're all in on the joke but the only thing i seem to find laughable are the reasons i no longer believe are good enough to not make this the final punchline. © Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without … Continue reading joke’s on me

The Pills You Take To Mend Will Be the Architects of Your Destruction: A Musing on Paxil and the Struggle With Madness


Illustration by Joel Benjamin

Someone dear to me shared this outstanding post from Vice News on the subject of psychiatric medication withdrawal. You can find the original post by following this link.

Below is one of my own rantings on the subject from recent months.



I have been on and off various psychiatric medications for my entire adult life, mostly concurrent with a good fifteen plus years of self-medication with “illicit” drugs and alcohol. Surprise of all surprises, I am also the kind of “adult” who can never seem to get his fucking life together.  This instability accounts for my inconsistency with staying on the legal drugs — I lose a job, I lose insurance coverage, I lose my doctor, I lose my mind.  In the midst of this, I destroy everything. 

Beyond that, I have ever increasing doubts about the efficacy of psych meds at all, coupled with growing anecdotal evidence and research suggesting I’ve never been accurately diagnosed in the first place. But that is a topic for another time…

I mentioned here that, for various reasons and circumstances, I would be going off the current “wonder drug” that I’ve been pumping through…

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“The demons got my beautiful, loving daughter…” via The Washington Post

Read "My daughter, who lost her battle with mental illness, is still the bravest person I know" by Doris A. Fuller on The Washington Post. In case some of y'all don't know, this "crazy emo brain cloud bullshit" kills motherfuckers.  This kind of story always hits home, because it makes me realize the potential consequences … Continue reading “The demons got my beautiful, loving daughter…” via The Washington Post