Musings on a Wednesday: Randomness and Observations

image

– There’s nothing like the smell of wet cow ass in the morning. It smells like…well, like wet cow ass.

– Must be a leak over my bunk when it rains heavy, because I slept in a wet spot that I am 98% sure I didn’t make. Okay….82% sure.

– Is it oxymoronic to despise someone you’ve just met and otherwise know nothing about, based solely on their apparent association with a hate group? I feel like it kind of is, but I also feel like I’m kind of okay with that.

I don’t have to know a KKK member to think they are a piece of shit.

— Lady Mary

– Getting paid to do a whole lot of nothing for eight hours and then being rained out for the last two make for an easy workday. But an easy workday is not necessarily a “good” workday. Because FUCKING BORING!

– Somebody should start a cell phone service marketed specifically to the oilfield and pipeline that gets decent service out in all these B.F.E. locations. Since it’s for the oilfield and pipeline, they could overcharge like crazy and motherfuckers will pay it. You could make MILLIONS.

– I often consider murder as a preferable alternative to finding ways to coexist with a deplorable person. Then I think, well, that isn’t very Buddhist of me. Then, I double check which direction the blade on my pocket knife unfolds, in case I need to open it quickly.

image

– The worst thing about using a freshly-pumped portable shitter is having the chemical water splash back up from a “projectile” and coat your undercarriage with filth. Well…that’s maybe not the worst thing, but it’s up there…

– So many many things in this world piss me off. You may have noticed. But few things piss me off more than unsubstantiated arrogance and swagger. Perhaps it has something to do with the apparent “fact” that those who actually have something to be cocky about generally are conversely humble and gracious. The motherfuckers that strut and cackle usually don’t have shit to back it up. Usually.

I will not do what the tick tells me to…
… I will not do what the tick tells me to…
… I will not do what the tick tells me to…
…I will not…….

— The Ryan

– Some days, when a person or situation disrupts my delicate sensibilities to the extent that the Others take over before I can practice “letting go,” I end up in a downward spiraling snowball of scorn and loathing that grows to consume the entirety of my consciousness to the point that I can only see the destruction of all existence as a solution. I feel only hatred. I can no longer see through my own perspective and headspace to determine if this is simply a byproduct of my sickness, if my anger and sense of apocalyptic hatred is just and warranted, if anyone or anything even deserves to fucking live, to exist. I say lay waste to the wasted. Be done with it.

Fuck money, fuck friends, fuck family! Fuck pussy, fuck drugs, fuck sanity! I don’t give a shit! Why?! ‘Cuz ignorance is bliss! Right?!

— Flatbush ZOMBiES, “Bliss”

– Sometimes I like pie. But not apple pie. Unless it is green chile apple pie. Seriously, yo…that shit is bomb.

image

– No matter who you are, no matter what it is…music fixes everything. At least until the song’s over. Then you might actually have to do something yourself to keep shit fixed. But, fuck that, right?! ;-D

One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain…

— Bob Marley

– The moment I am writing something, it is the most brilliant and insightful thing ever committed to paper. The moment after I write something, I despise it with the fury of one thousand suns. I feel like I am not alone in this.

– I am stuck at the crossing of what is essentially a different version of the same fucking train I spent forty minutes trapped by a couple of weeks ago. I know this because of the graffiti. Or because I only dreamt this before, and now the shit is happening for real. And I have no data connection.

image

© Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

You’re gonna sit here…and you’re gonna LIKE it!

Having a mandatory company picnic is like holding people hostage with food as your weapon. Well, food and the threat of unemployment. Has anyone ever really lost their job for refusing to participate in mandated “leisure” time? The world is stupid enough that I am sure it has happened, but I won’t personally find out today. Not because I am choosing to stay at this obligatory gathering of my own volition, however. I mean, shit…I have to see these ugly fuckers for sixty hours a week as it is. But I couldn’t leave even if I wanted to. “Home” is over 90 miles away, and my “boss” is also my ride.

Mandatory fun time. Goddamnit all.

*sigh*

© Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Work We Do or Do Not Do

image

“We may know that the work we continue to put off doing will be bad. Worse, however, is the work we never do. A work that’s finished is at least finished. It may he poor, but it exists, like a miserable plant in the lone flowerpot of my neighbour who’s crippled. That plant is her happiness, and sometimes it’s even mine. What I write, bad as it is, may provide some hurt or sad soul a few moments of distraction from something worse. That’s enough for me, or it isn’t enough, but it serves some purpose, and so it is with all of life.”

Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet

Monday Morning Musings

image

Careful, motherfuckers, The Ryan is on the loose! No adult supervision! This could end badly…

As the “responsible” party in this relationship, Jenn Baby had to return to work today in order to further pervert and reshape the minds of America’s youth. The little bastards! >:]

As such, rather than leave me at home all day to play indoor, multi-story fetch with Sir Oswald and sniff my way through the roommate’s panty drawer, Lady Jenn gave me the keys to her luxurious German sedan (Volks-VAGON! NEIN!!!), and carte blanche to do as I please. “Within reason.” But, what is reasonable? Whatever my mind regards as a logical and conscious act, I suppose? >:D

image

Since this is a public site and open to viewing by my Sweetness and anyone else who cares to stop by, I should point out that I am planning to spend the next eight or so hours driving to the Pacific Coast chilling at a nearby park and writing writing writing! If only the weather would cooperate…

Speaking of weather, um…what in the good and righteous fuck is this white shit covering the range surrounding The Meadows?! This is the DESERT, amiright? In goddamn FEBRUARY?!  So, unless one of Colombia’s infamous under-radar drug flights spontaneously combusted high in the sky, showering its contents across the Las Vegas desert valley range — I didn’t sign up for this shit.

image

I was in an irritatingly chipper and vibrantly manic mood since waking this morning. My random, compulsive and cheerful yammering nearly got me a punch to the gooch from Madame Jenn on the way to her place of “bidness.”  It lasted all of another five minutes, until I came to stop at a red light on Alexander and Durango.  Suddenly and without warning, I wanted to punch the entirety of existence in its stupid fucking FACE. And for no discernable reason, mind you…but sometimes a belligerent bad Buddhist just needs to be consumed by scorn and loathing, motherfucker. 😉

I use the swear words a lot. I notice that most other bloggers and social media users do not, or do so sparingly. I am going to go ahead and assume this is not because you people find callous, direct, and offensive language to be a tool of the weak-minded and under-literate. I’m thinking I probably just give less fucks about rubbing the other dumb, ugly human meat-wrapped bags of calcium and liquid the “wrong way.”

image

Just so you know, I include myself at the top of the list for dumb, ugly human meat-wrapped bags of calcium and liquid. I do stupid shit constantly, I make horribly illogical and functionally poor decisions, I hardly ever truly know what I’m talking about, and — much like the rest of us — I have zero goddamn idea what I am doing in Life or in any given speck of a moment.  We are all simply struggling to find our path through this frightening and chaotic mess of existence and toil!

There was a brilliant and intellectually revitalizing line of thought that began to form in my head during that last paragraph, which I intended to flesh out here. Unfortunately, I get distracted by self-editing as I write, and so I have haphazardly wandered from that vital subjective musing, and now cannot find my way back.

LOST! All is LOST!!!

image

WHYYYY Lawd?! It shoulda been ME!!!

© Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Ryan Scott Sanders and Dharma and Belligerence: Mad Rants from a Free-Range Buddhist Hooligan with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.